I am announcing the launch of a brand-new weekly feature here at 750 Volts, in the spirit of Weenie Of The Week of Not Larry Sabato, Winner of the Week of Ditzy Democrats, and Cheers and Jeers of Daily Kos, the difference being that none of them have made strained puns while naming it.

Modeled after Newsweek’s “Conventional Wisdom”, 750 Volts Presents….

The Virginia Voltmeter will be posted every Thursday, a weekly take on who’s moving up and who’s moving down, and is, as far as I know, the only such conventional wisdom watch in state politics. Maybe there’s a reason it’s never been tried before.

This week’s edition focuses on yesterday’s Shad Planking. What a wonderful batch of news we have from there…

Anyway, here goes:

Ben Tribbett: Master of Virginia’s political gossip and scandal (whether he is the center or not) Ben is a figure large enough to be needled in the Shad Planking speech, in addition to surviving a car ride all the way down to Wakefield with none other than Kenton Ngo.

Andy Hurst: Dwarfs primary opponent in fundraising total, gets dwarfed by opponent in fundraising total. Gets a bit excited and angers Ben Tribbett, and provokes Vince enough to pull a label out of the Stalinist/Communist/Socialist bag. Two volatile figures right there.

University of Virginia: Students stage sit-in protesting poverty wages paid by UVA to their employees, get arrested. The wages still haven’t been raised. Obviously the car-burning hasn’t started yet.

Jim Webb: Has huge showing at Shad Planking, showing that he’s the only candidate in the primary that has more than 2 supporters.

Hampton Roads Daily Press: Couple days after I was done with them, the DP reports the fundraising totals (forgetting cash-on-hand matters too), and resurrects David Ashe’s candidacy. Oooops.

Harris Miller: Both his supporters brought a dismal turnout to the Shad Planking, however, Harris doesn’t get a “down” rating because he was at 0 to begin with.

JUdy Feder: Outraises Frank Wolf 2.4:1. Get your website up already!

The New Orleans Times Picayune: Okay, not in Virginia. Wins Pulitzer Prize…still doesn’t have city.

Nebraska: Hey, uh, segregation = NOT COOL.

Vincent Thoms: Gets mentioned in the Washington Post for breaking a major story about Darrell Green’s state senate run, and even James Young thinks he’s right.

George Allen: Has his head in the clouds staring at the White House, while forgetting he needs to keep his feet in Virginia. Snubs being born in New Hampshire for being born in Iowa. Totes Iowa plates to Shad Planking. Soon, he’ll put an ear of corn in his boot and call himself the Ethanol Cowboy, or worse.

Wakefield Ruritan Club: Once again entices hundreds of Virginia’s political movers and shakers to go eat bony fish smoked on a board in the middle of nowhere while paying $20 a ticket. Nice.

North Carolina Shad: Virginia shad are already gone. Guess who’s getting themselves planked now?

Al Weed: We’ll see how his vicious little mailer plays out.

Gerry Connolly: The troubled chairman of the Fairfax Board of Supervisors angers his own employees by threatening to eject every single last one of them from a hearing over a pay raise.

Fairfax County Public Schools: Didn’t have to deal with Vince or Kenton on the day of the Shad Planking.

Waldo Jaquith: The flu.

Leave your own lines on anyone I missed in the comments.